Thursday, May 26, 2011

Rant: Public Restrooms




Is there anything worse than public restrooms?

No.  The answer is No.

If I have to pee, but a bathroom is disgusting (and many of them are), I can 'hold it' longer than anyone I know.  You don't expect me to actually put my ass on that thing, do you?

And is it so damn hard to flush the toilet?  

Here's the problem: you never know what you're walking into.

Fortunately, I have identified the best restroom in the hospital - the administrative suite on the 4th floor.

Well worth climbing a flight of stairs. 

But for some freakish reason, my pee schedule often coincides with the closing of the Best Bathroom every day while the housekeepers clean.  

Still, as often as possible, I enjoy its bright lights, clean tile and automatic paper towel dispenser that actually works.

Unless every stall is taken.  Because then, chances are high that someone is doing Number Two. 

Number Two in public should be illegal.

For God sake, train you body to do the noisy/smelly thing at home.  I mean, really, is this how you want to be remembered?

Absolutely the worst scenario is when you're innocently going in for a quick morning pee. Suddenly, in the stall next door, you hear all sorts of farting sounds and kids dropping in the pool.  

And then there's the smell...Jesus, the smell...what exactly have you been eating?

You hurry to wash your hands and get the hell out of there just as your boss walks out of the stall.

Some memories are harder to erase than others.

If you leave your house at all, you will encounter some nasty-ass bathrooms.  Best to find a few that you like and stick with them, even if you have to go the extra mile just for peace of mind. 

Let's all do our part to make public restrooms less disgusting by keeping our 'private business' private. 

image from old-wizzard.com

4 comments:

  1. Hahahaa! I have no problems with public bathrooms, no problems with doing any number there but I do (1) do the 'courtesy flush' and 2) muffle sounds with toilet paper.

    Because I have given birth i.e. being all exposed down there to numerous people, and various sorts of fluids, sounds and smells oozing out of my body, the public bathroom does not frighten me anymore! (but I sure did have a fear of them prior to that)

    I actually starting taking photos of the best public bathrooms around, but unfortunately lost the photos I had and haven't started up again.

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  2. well, i know what you mean about them being disgusting, but don't hurt yourself holding it. it's not good for your bladder or your system.

    what's even worse is when you find out one of your coworkers doesn't wash her hands!!! eeewww!

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  3. Hi Frida - you have a much healthier and relaxed view of public restrooms. If I find a restroom that is great, it's such a delight - I can understand why you took pictures! Thanks for stopping by.

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  4. Hi Anonymous - Thanks for the caution, I'll keep it in mind. You're right - it's gross when one doesn't wash her hands...eeewww indeed!

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