Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Letting Go Again

Yesterday, my boss retired, six months after giving notice.  Her position is not yet filled, leaving an odd blank in the organization.

A reception was held in her honor at the hospital and people stood in line outside the boardroom to thank her for all that she has done over the past 30 years.

And to say farewell.

She referred to this event as 'the viewing,' and in a way, it was.  One last chance to say goodbye to her as my boss, mentor and colleague.

One more thing to let go.  I'm languishing in self pity.

All day, I fought the urge to escape.  I considered driving to Park City, going to Bath and Body Works for more nighttime lotion or making the journey to Mom's grave.

I've never been there alone.

But I stayed at the hospital and went to the open house instead.  We both got teary.

Last week, she invited me to a bar afterward with her and some friends from work.  I considered this, but decided to go home and have a martini with B-man.  

I couldn't really handle another goodbye.

She and I will connect soon enough at a different time, in another place.

Scent of the Day?  Ambre Sultan.

Image from


  1. What a coincidence, you wearing Ambre Sultan on the same day as me. I hope it's warmth gave you some comfort.

  2. Loss is loss is loss...I understand your desire to run, to avoid another goodbye. Thinking about you and looking forward to talking with you about the changes.

  3. Bummer! As if you didn't have enough loss in your life to contend with. At least you say you will stay in touch with your colleague, but she will leave a big void at the office after so many years of service.

  4. Hi kjanicki - Ambre Sultan was the perfect perfume yesterday. Comforting, warm and also somehow nostalgic. Loved it.

  5. Hey Mermaid, you're so right - every loss taps into another. I'm looking forward to seeing you, too. A light in an otherwise dreary January.

  6. Hi Vanessa - thanks for your comment. Yes, I'm glad that my colleague and friend can stay in touch, but everything is different now. Still, it's some consolation.

  7. I haven´t yet tried Ambre Sultan. ... so can´t say anything about it. These days I feel my dad needs me by his side but alas, we live far from each other, so i can only see him once every week. we speak on the phone but it´s not the same.

  8. Hi Vintage Lady - it's so hard to be far apart from a parent when you feel they need you! I wish I was closer to my dad, too. I love - and miss - his gentle fun and open spirit. You're right, the phone is not the same.



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